Tuesday, January 21, 2014

Dear Satan, We are so not friends

There are two types of people in this world.  Those who act, and those who are acted upon.  I have decided that I am going to be one of those people who acts.  There are a lot flaws I have and that many others have as well, a very wide variety.  But I think the biggest flaw is to not be willing to be an actor in this play of life but to be a puppet.  I am so constantly disappointed in people in my life that KNOW what right is, they KNOW, and yet they are too afraid by the cunning and slight of men to do what is right.  They get trapped in that great and spacious building of pride.  At least by acting against the sways of life we can chart our own course rather than being carried away.  

This week has been very hard.  Why?  Sandi Richardson is getting baptized.  Which is SO GREAT!  But it also means doom and torment from the adversary.  Some of it has come in the form of me being hard on myself about things I don't like.  Some of it has come from letting things my companion does bug me instead of just getting over it or talking to her about it.  But the worst kind has come from Satan attacking my investigators with fear.  The ones I've grown closest to, and are the closest to making big changes in their life, are at that point where they have to act and move forward, or we can't meet anymore because they won't let themselves progress.  They are feeding off of the light and the incredible spiritual experiences we have when we meet with each other, but they aren't willing to feed that fuel and have those experiences by themselves.  And mostly, they are afraid for what their families and friends will think of them.  It breaks my heart.  Why Satan?  It makes me so sad that people are afraid of acting on the truth because they care about the opinions of others.


But that used to be me.  All I can say is that I am so glad I came on a mission.  I was terrified, absolutely terrified to come out here and be scorned and mocked and shamed by others who think I am a fool.  But to be honest, I don't really care as much any more, because I know what the truth is.  The longer I am out here, the more I want to care what God thinks about me, and the less I care about the opinions of others.  I just want Him to be happy.


Last Wednesday we went on exchanges in Regina with Sister Denton and Sister Meservy.  We almost didn't go because there was a funeral for the bishop of the ward that day.  Overall it was very good.  We helped each other see the importance of appropriate goal setting.


After last weeks report to my mission president, President Thomas, this is what he sent me:

Thanks for a great report. It sounds like you really are getting an understanding of your stewardship and how best to help them. I am so pleased with all of our new Sisters. They are wonderful and seem to have such strong testimonies and a desire to serve. ... Thanks for all you are doing and please pace yourself so you don't crash on me. Love you.


Yes... I think I'm getting better at the not crashing part. Life is hard, but I have decided to be one who acts and is not acted upon.  I have decided to push forward through whatever the adversary tosses my way.


Lastly, I just want to issue you a challenge.  Yesterday in the Moose Jaw Ward, Bishop Moore asked everyone in the congregation to read two pages a day from the Book of Mormon.  It starts today, so if you read two pages .  Please read it.  Ezra Taft Benson's famous quote:   It is not just that the Book of Mormon teaches us truth, though it indeed does that. It is not just that the Book of Mormon bears testimony of Christ, though it indeed does that, too. But there is something more. There is a power in the book which will begin to flow into your lives the moment you begin a serious study of the book. You will find greater power to resist temptation. You will find the power to avoid deception. You will find the power to stay on the strait and narrow path. The scriptures are called “the words of life” (D&C 84:85), and nowhere is that more true than it is of the Book of Mormon. When you begin to hunger and thirst after those words, you will find life in greater and greater abundance. 
                                        
Sorry this is SO short... I am always running out of time!

I love you all very much and I will let you know my transfer call next week!

LOVE, Sister Heidi Hill     

No comments:

Post a Comment