First things first, this week we had an AMAZING zone conference in Saskatoon with Elder Malm of the 70.  It was super.  At the end, the leadership in the Saskatchewan side of the mission got together and had a mini-meeting, and afterwards Elder Malm asked to interview me along with a couple other people, but because I had to get back to Regina he told me to go ahead and head home. :(  Sad day.  But it was rather flattering.

Things were all fine and dandy for both the drive there and the drive back home.  The next afternoon however, I started to feel pretty sick.  But I thought everything was fine and it would pass so we continued onto our lessons.  Bad idea.  We were in the middle of going over the baptismal interview questions with one of our investigators when I couldn't take it anymore. "I'm sorry," I said, "but I'm feeling really sick."  "Do you need some water?" she asked.  "How about a bowl?"  So she quickly got a big bowl and as soon as she handed it to me I puked right in it.  I know.  Pretty graphic right?  Yeah.  Then I took the bowl and continued to heave for another couple minutes on her stairs, all while Sister Christensen tries to maintain order.  Super awkward.  Then I cleaned her bowl, we prayed, and we went home.  I ended up throwing up all night until 2:00 AM.  The elders came over that evening to give me a blessing, and I was feeling so sick, I couldn't sit in my chair.  So I lay on the couch and hid in a blanket until Elder Bruneel told me, "You can lay on the couch, but you're going to have to come out from under the blanket because I'm not going in there!"  :)  Ba ha ha.

It made me super sad though, being sick.  If Jesus Christ went through all that pain for me (compounded with every time I have gotten or will get sick), for every person who's ever had to slog through chemo, for every person who's been burned, broken bones, or been badly hurt in some way, for every person who's been depressed, angered, sad, abandoned--that's a WHOLE lot of love.

So I spent all of Thursday resting at home instead of going on exchanges.  It was good though.  It gave me time to think through things, and as I wrote in my journal I realized, if I'm going be happier and stop stressing all of the time, I'm going to need to be happy in the little things.  I'm going to need to be happy with the progress of people line upon line, rather than demanding perfection in my head, because things just aren't going to work out that way.  That's not how Heavenly Father works either.  Even though Heavenly Father asks for exact obedience, I don't think He looks at us and checks of all of the things we're not doing to frown upon us.  I think He's cheering us on. "Sister Hill actually read her scriptures!"  or "Sister Hill chose to be kind instead of making a snide comment!" It's not about where people are or aren't at in the scale of "perfect".  It's about the growth they're making.  I know, we've heard it all our lives, but I'm coming to learn that really, it's true.

And people are growing.  Six less active people came to church this week! There are also less-active members I work with that have a totally different background with different disadvantages than a lot of the most active people at church.  These people may not dress as nice, and they definitely don't make it to church every week, but their background allows for a different stage in the progress of growth.  They'll get there someday, but for today, they're working on smaller steps.  And when they step, Joyous day. :)  Line upon line.

The highlight of my week I think I could say, is when Shannon, who set her own baptismal date earlier in the week, came with her boyfriend and their six boys to church.  We had to get three car loads to get them all home, but they loved it!  And everyone was so good to them too. :)  Yes!  Now the goal is getting Ron to want it, which he really seems to, and helping them get married so they can get baptized.  Pray for them!

Thanks for reading!  Can't wait to talk in person!  Love you!

Sister Heidi Hill

 

It's about taking joy in the little miracles.

That's what I was trying to say in a nutshell.

Ok, I'm done.

 

PS. (Sister Slope and Sister Mormonsen are what Elder Waters and Elder Banovich call us "behind our backs" apparently.  Ha ha!)

  Zone conference

Shannon's baby in a moss bag she made herself!

Me, Brother Waugh and Joseph.  Brother Waugh made me wear that hat through all of the meal appointment that night and none of the other five missionaries had hats.  Silly.

Sickness, Struggles, and Spanish Speakers

My email title makes my life sound way more depressing than it is.  Life is actually great, but I did get sick again this week.  You know, fever, chills, sneezing, the works.  I have decided that it comes from stress.  I need to stop stressing so much.

I was thinking about why I stress, and the conclusion I came to is this: the biggest reason that I stress out is because I don't want the people I love to have to struggle.  

 

Here's the problem: I am a problem solver.  Ironic, no? You're probably thinking, 'that's great Sister Hill'.  But truly, it's not, because people's problems consume me.  As a missionary, people are always telling us about their problems, because frequently we ask the questions no one else will, or thinks about.  For some reason I had gotten it into my head that it was my job to fix everyone's problems because I am a missionary.  That means that I should have all of the answers right?  Wrong.

 

This was what I was concerned with when I went through the temple this week, and it was amazing.  I have a testimony of the temple, and that it gives us a clearer understanding of what we are here on this earth to do and who we are. As I went through the temple on Thursday with our ward council, it was so nice.  I came to realize that central to why we are here on the earth is to struggle, not so that we can be in pain, but so that we can truly appreciate the joy in life and gain true understanding.  I have come to learn that it is not my job to solve other people's problems, but to lead them Christ and let them learn on their own no matter how long it takes.  If I solve their problems, which I am incapable of doing anyways, I rob them from the joy and resolution that comes from them solving it with Christ.

 

You think I would have learned that a little sooner.  But you know.  I am just SO grateful I have a temple in my area!  I am SO blessed!

I am also blessed in the fact that an investigator from the small Saskatchewan town of Estavan moved into Lewvan this week.  She is the mother of two young girls and has a baptismal date for November 22nd.  I'm not sure that she'll keep that date, but she has a lot of great potential and has already grown so much so I am excited to work with her.  She is already in 1 Nephi 6 since we invited her to read from the beginning and her reading comprehension is great!

Something kind of crazy: three of our four current investigators speak Spanish as their native language!  We started teaching another lady from Columbia this week.  This has given me a greater desire to learn Spanish!  So Sister Christensen and I have been working on learning the first vision in Spanish.

 

Vi una columna de luz, mas brilliante que el sol..... arriba de mi cabeza.... descansar sobre mi. I have more in my head but it's not coming out right now so those are the patches. Hopefully I will have more to Spanish to share next week!

Funny Moment of the Week:

 

I was going back through my journal this week from before my mission and the beginning parts. (Which by the was is crazy.  I was experiencing SO much opposition to coming out here!  Satan did not want me here!) Anyways. I was reading about a story Sister Christensen had told us over lunch one day.  

 

Sister C: "So we gave this elder a #10 can of Pork and Beans, because apparently he really likes beans and they asked us to sign it."

 

Sister Wu: "That elder hates being told he likes beans because apparently he has gas problems."

 

Sister C: "Oh no! I wrote 'Magical Fruit: Enjoy!!!"

 

I read that aloud to Sister Christensen one day and we just burst out laughing!!!!! Good times...

But thinking back to those times, pre-mission and even at the beginning of it, I remember realizing and being frustrated that I cared way too much about what others thought about me.  Something beautiful that I am gaining from my mission is caring way less about what others think about me and feeling great because I pay way more attention to what Heavenly Father thinks! It's a beautiful feeling.

Thank you everybody! I love you!

Sister Heidi Hill

This is a picture I'm working on coloring because I am trying to tone down the stress.

Sister Christensen and I went out to Shannon's farm to help her prepare to paint and it was so fun!

Shannon has lots of cows!

Heal click!