This week we were able to see the Lewvan Sisters after specialized
training. I went with Sister Christensen, who was my first friend in
the mission and I spent lot of time with in my first transfer because we
lived across the hall from each other. We both have learned a lot
since then, and we both learned a lot from exchanges. I really took
specialized training to heart, and even wrote "My line is in the water."
on the back/bottom of my clippy name tag that clips on my coat pocket
to remind myself that every time I leave the apartment, I should be
talking with everyone. I gave my heart to the Lord, and rather than
asking, "should I talk with that person?" it became, "what and how?",
not if. As soon as I did that, the Lord was able to direct my path, and
when we had fifteen minutes before a teaching appointment, we decided
to do some knocking, and I felt we should knock on a door I had noticed a
man walk by earlier. We knocked twice, and after waiting for a while
we walked away, only to hear a "Hello?" coming from the doorway. We
rushed back to find a single mother who had just moved to Regina to
escape an abusive husband in Fort Qapelle, and was in a perfect position
to hear the gospel. Sister Christensen asked her if she could use some
religion in her life, and she invited the Lewvan Sisters to come back
the following week. :)
We were stuck in Lewvan for another day after the exchange because
of a major storm, and had to stay in after dinner, so we had a party
talking about the word of wisdom and I worked on some knitting I brought
with me.
As for me, I am learning so much right now. I have been totally
overwhelmed and overly consumed by stress, and I didn't even know why I
am stressing. Perhaps I still don't know the full extent of it.
However I got advice and a blessing from a member, Brother Sherlock,
and he really helped me to see and understand what I was stressed about
(that I'm not able to solve everybody's problems, even though I so badly
want to help). The blessing was a really special experience, and then
he invited Sister Fellows and I to his family's house that afternoon to
share some things with me. He told us something his dad created called
the 4 D's of Administration. It tells us that if we can't change things
even if we acted, Drop it. If you don't have enough information to
know how a situation should be handled, Delay it. If it's not your job
to fix it, Delegate it. If none of those apply, Do it. It may seem
really simple, but it has really helped me. I realized that there are
so many people I am expecting myself to change or help. So many
decisions I make everyday, but I can't do it all, so I have become a
bundle of stress. He talked about Alma 14:9-13 and how sometimes we
aren't meant to do everything even if it is really good. God knows
more, and he will take care of things in His way, in His time.
That has helped a lot. I have a lot I need to change about myself
to be happier, and I know it will probably take some time, but I know
that through Jesus Christ I can change all things and become the person I
need to become. That is the beauty of the gospel. The doctrine of
Christ doesn't only apply for what is often labeled as "sins" and
"misdeeds" but for lifestyles, attitudes and behaviors that hold us back
and pull us down from being who we truly need to be. I am applying the
atonement in my life to help me overcome this lifestyle that has been
apart of me for so long.
We didn't get any new investigators this week, and I'm not sure
why. I don't know what I was or wasn't doing that was holding me back.
I was trying to follow the spirit, but sometimes it is still so hard to
tell. I know there are people for us to find, and I know that many of
them are ready to be baptized... I'm just still figuring out how to find
them.... I really did appreciate specialized training though... Sister
Fellows and I are in re-evaluation of ourselves and area. We will be
doing a lot of studying from chapter 9 this week (the chapter in Preach
My Gospel about Finding). Please pray for missionary experiences to
help others understand the atonement of Jesus Christ. Please pray for
eye-awakening opportunities to see how you can change through the
atonement of Christ.
Love,
Sister Heidi Hill
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